Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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