The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
