I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
