She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
Randomize