What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
