I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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