i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
