ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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