it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I accidentally had phone sex last night
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
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