What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize