He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
