i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
She's the barista slut.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize