This is not my ceiling
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Im part way to drunk.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize