If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I AM VODKA MAN
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Randomize
