I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize