break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
