This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
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