you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
They are going to name an STD after you.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize