I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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