: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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