you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
