yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
