If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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