Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
last night I used snow as a chaser
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