Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
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