i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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