Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
