I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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