What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
