Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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