I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
