She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Randomize
