Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize