White coat. Heels.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
