We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
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