Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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