At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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