i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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