i can't believe i had my finger in that
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
