He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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