fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
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