it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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