you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
