watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize
