During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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