Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
