The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
