hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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