I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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