drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
